About a month ago I became a little out of balance, which resulted in some negativity. Usually when I fall into an occasional rut of negativity, I don't really notice how negative I am. I usually try to stay conscious of my self and what my thoughts are. I've never wanted to be one of those people who are unaware of their unawareness. (Give that one some thought).
Recently I've come back to using the power of "thank you" to turn my negativity back around. Instead of being frustrated with my children for not doing what I ask, I've been intently watching for opportunities to thank them when they do something right. It feels so much better than yelling and being unhappy with motherhood.
I have found that thanking adult friends and family members also has the same effect. People love feeling appreciated. When they feel appreciated, they want to continue doing things that make them feel good.
Sometimes a simple, "thank you" is all that is needed. Other times I find it more impactful to fortify the words with something more heartfelt, like, "Thank you so much for taking the trash out! It's one of my least favorite things to do, so when you do it for me, I really feel loved." I like to look my children in the eyes and fortify it even further with a hug. (This combines "words of affirmation" with "physical touch" - see my post about love languages).
If there is something that bothers you about someone, resist the urge to talk about them to others that share your annoyance, or anyone else for that matter. Instead, see if you can inspire a change in a subtle way by using thanking techniques. Afterall, if you really do love someone, wouldn't it make sense to protect their reputation by helping them to improve?
And lastly, always be the type of person worthy of being thanked. Give others a reason to thank you! Be considerate. Be courteous. In an everyday setting, see a need and fill it. In a group setting, if you see that a dirty plate needs to be removed from the living room after a party - put it in the sink. If you see that a mother has her hands full with her children - offer to hold the baby while she tends to the other children's immediate needs.
I know that in my life, by taking the time to give thanks and praise those around me as well as being willing to offer a helping hand, my positive energy increases and I feel happier inside. And in my experience, the happier I feel inside, the more happiness I attract to me. Like attracts like, so choose to attract happiness and beauty in your life today, starting with gratitude and graciousness!
In the spirit of gratitude, it only makes sense to let my readers know how thankful I am for you! Sure, writing is theraputic for me, so without readers I would still receive some benefit. However, receiving comments, and hearing that I have something to offer someone else is what really makes it worthwhile to me!